Word prompt: Regret

REGRET

This is a complicated concept that can pose several problems. What do we regret? Why do we regret it? What if we can go back and change what we regret? Is this a good idea? What if what we regret brought us in line with where we needed to be right now? Going through bad can bring us to good. Yes? No? Maybe?

I can say I regret many things, as I am sure anyone can. My biggest regret was wasting my twenties on a relationship that I allowed to go on longer than I should have. That was due to fear which is a whole other word prompt exercise! Don’t worry we’ll get to it!

One of the things I am working on in therapy is taking negative and looking for the positive so here it goes! Instead of thinking about how I wish I hadn’t gone to hell and back over and over again; I should think about what did that relationship bring me? What good can I pull from it? Would I be where I am today? Would I be writing to you?

So here is a short list of positive things

  1. My history BA and MA degrees. He was vocal in our returning to school.
  2. My job at the library. This is where I discovered that I wanted to be a librarian. The history department secretary at the time never had my email correct so I didn’t get the notice that the library was looking for graduate students for a few job openings. He did.
  3. My close knit group of friends that no matter what I was going through were always there when I needed them. They tried to help but at the time I wasn’t ready to help myself. They have been very supportive as I go through my healing.
  4. My ability to recognize the signs of an unhealthy relationship as soon as it starts to turn. My 2nd relationship only lasted 4 months before I had to end it. This even involved a trip to court for a protection order. Something that I would have never done before (but ironically “regret” not doing at the time!).
  5. The knowledge of knowing what I do not have to put up with. That I am worthy of love and respect. Despite everything I held on tight to the idea that not all men are the same and I have been fortunate enough to have met the greatest guy I could have ever asked for.

Knowing where I am now how can I regret the past? If I could change my past it would have changed my present and my present is full of love and happiness. Instead of regretting the past I need to learn more about letting it go which is significantly harder to do.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Word prompt: Regret

  1. I think regret is part of unforgiveness. We can’t do anything about the past, so it’s best not to waste time fretting over shoula, could, woulda. However, if and when we are reminded of something in the past that pains us, it may be an opportunity to ask ourselves if we need forgiveness or to ask forgiveness. If there’s something in my past that pains me because I hurt someone else, then I should offer that person my apology and leave it at that. Even if they don’t forgive me, I’ve done my part and now when that piece of past comes up, I turn away from it, it’s over. If it was something I did that harmed myself, like stay in an abusive relationship, I forgive myself. I take stock of what I learned and bless myself to move forward.

    Energy is a precious commodity for me, better to spend it on things I can do, rather than things I have no control over.

    Peace and love to you,
    Holly

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s