Why I take my picture

I knew this morning while I was on the bus that I wanted to take time today to blog. I spent my commute contemplating what the topic will be and BAM! While thinking about my blog topic and mindlessly scrolling the Facebook I came across this quote that someone posted in one of my favorite body positive groups. Shit like this really grinds my gears because I absolutely HATE when people group others under one umbrella. In this case it is the equating taking a “selfie” with narcissistic behavior. They didn’t even spell narcissistic correctly! Not sure if that was on purpose or not so I’ll leave it at that.

Yes narcissistic is defined as having an excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one’s physical appearance.

  • synonyms: vain, self-loving, self-admiring, self-absorbed, self-obsessed, conceited, self-centered, self-regarding, egotistic, egotistical, egoistic; informal full of oneself

But does this mean that everyone that posts a selfie has a narcissistic personalty? Absolutely not!

Some of us post selfies because of years and years of being subjected to actual narcissist people that our self-esteem had been beaten to a bloody pulp!

Some of us post selfies as a result of spending years living with someone who crapped on us so much that we hated everything about ourselves!

Some of us post selfies because there was a time when looking in the mirror was avoided at all costs because not even we want to look at us!

Some of us post selfies because of all the time we spent hating ourselves that we are being to explore what it is like to love us as we are!

Selfie does not automatically equate narcissism. Every single person has their own story and their own life that they are living. To say a person who takes a selfie is narcissistic is to believe the world is black and white. It is to ignore peoples struggles and journeys.

For instance, my selfies, first and foremost, are a middle finger to my ex who constantly put me down. Who was ashamed of my weight. Wore hats in public so he wouldn’t be seen with me. Called me a beached whale heading to our one beach day a year. One occasion even bought me clothes 7 sizes too small as motivation to lose weight.

My selfies also stand against the idea we need to all fit into the cookie cutter ideal of health and beauty. My friends on my Facebook page will notice that I often post my “outfits of the day” on Torrid’s page. I do this because since I discovered my new found self-acceptance I started to branch out my clothing purchases to things I hadn’t worn in nearly 15 years. Things such as dresses, skirts, tank tops, colors other than black, and well pretty much anything that showed any skin whatsoever. I try to lead by example. An “if I can do it anyone can” kind of thing.

Last but not least I am sure… my selfies are a display of a self love that I never experienced and I’ll be damed if anyone will try to take that away from me!

Apparently loving ourselves as we are is a radical stance to take in a world that is constantly trying to tell you otherwise.

Don’t judge a book before you read it!


Why do you take your picture?


10 thoughts on “Why I take my picture

  1. Your ex sounds like a right piece of work. It’s one thing to mention to a partner that your worried their weight might affect their health but being cruel about it is just plain wrong. If anything it pushes people the other way and into destructive mindsets.
    If your happy and healthy then what does it matter what shape you are. Good on you for regaining your confidence.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. First of all what an a**h*le the ex was. I agree. I am far from in love with myself-those who read and follow my blog know this. I think a lot of us -well me seeks validation that I am good enough to look at. Sometimes I am proud of the way I look because I have put myself down for so long. It is lovely to be appreciated or admired for a skill ,talent , style and the way we look. I encourage people to post selfies – I want people to feel good about themselves and not feel invincible to the world. Your look says I’m me and I am happy with that. That is sexy and attractive 🙂 I’m not coming on to you btw hahaha getting marries soon

    Liked by 1 person

  3. For the life of me I can’t figure out what people have against selfies! I think these are the same people that get worked up about the Kardashians despite having no actual contact with their media streams, it’s just something trendy to complain about. Keep on posting your selfies, enjoy opening yourself up to other people, and be political about it! You are allowed to enjoy yourself and your appearance and share that with the world 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dang straight! People also don’t realize there are more pictures because we no longer have to go to a store and buy disposables or film! We carry cameras on our phones now…


  4. Selfies are great. Get that boost from your peeps when you need it!

    But that said, I think we all have that one friend who ONLY posts selfies…every day….and we’re like, dude, the camera works in the other direction, too, ya know. LOL

    Meh, it’s their feed, they can post what they want! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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